24 August 2009

Manic Depression

I might be manic-depressive. There's a chance. It occurred to me a few days ago when I was reading about hypothyroidism and depression and bipolar (etc.), because I've known for a while that everything I go through (with the exception of the chronic pain) is cyclical. Sometimes I function better, sometimes I have no functionality. I thought that I was cycling through healthy and unhealthy, functioning and not-functioning, but it has occurred to me that maybe I'm cycling through manic and depression.
Anyway. I created a double-sided chart, one side labeled Dysthymic Phase (dysthymia is a low-grade, long-term type of depression that is linked to hypothyroidism), the other labeled Euphoric Phase. (These terms came from my reading about cyclothymia, a low-grade, long-term type of bipolar that is linked to hypothyroidism.) The symptoms are listed, and 31 days are set out. I started marking on the 20th, although I had been depressed before then, and until today, all my marks were on the Dysthymic Phase side.
Today I have one check mark on the DP side (Difficulty Making Decisions, based on the fact that I wandered around and around the store after work trying to figure out if I wanted to buy something to eat, and if so, what, even though I have food at home, I knew what I was going to eat, and actually, making the decision to just go home wasn't that difficult, either; I think I just wanted to spend money, and thus also marked Spending Sprees on the EP side), and all the rest on the EP side.
I was in a good mood earlier, and got hostile/aggressive (in my head) about customers at work and (out loud) to Jamie on the phone, etc. There's more.

So, this is just the initial report: today I appeared Manic for at least some of the day. We'll see how it continues.
Maybe I'll actually get some writing done.

(Ooh, earlier today I exhibited Increased Drive to Achieve Goals: I should mark that!)

Time to eat because I'm dying.
Love you all manically.


  1. I'm bipolar (the PC term for manic depressive, lol) so I know what that's like.

  2. Yeah, but Manic-Depressive is the Emilie Autumn term for bipolar ... Well, clearly not, she didn't make it up, but she uses it, because she deals in Victorian era.
    Blah, but anyway. Yay for fun times! (Also, when last you saw me, I was depressive. In case you hadn't noticed.)

  3. Oh I definitely noticed. Are you doing anything next saturday night? I was thinking of having a knitting/crochet party at my apartment, which basically is just sitting around working on our projects and talking, haha. I am inviting you and my friend Alyssa. Lemme know if that sounds good to you.


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